I want to make HIM famous.

Mother's Day. A day to show gratitude for mothers. How humbling, to require flowers and gratification for something that in some cases causes some so much pain. As a woman who has had four miscarriages, one of which was an ectopic pregnancy just a year ago, Mother's Day can be as painful as it is rewarding.

Instead of making women- mothers- mothers to be famous- instead, on this evening of Mother's Day I want to focus on HIM.

The one who leads with grace and humility that goes beyond the capability of my mind's comprehension. For those who do not know Him, let me "show" you who He is while giving you a laugh. When I say show you, I mean show through humor the grace and love that spills over when your heart is changed, and you begin living FOR GOD instead of for YOURSELF.

Today, not unlike most days, I was running late. The plan was to walk to Church with the kids and blow out some pent-up energy.

That, in fact DID NOT happen.

Two hours with three kids and yourself to get ready sure feels an awful lot more like thirty minutes. Fast forward to ten minutes before Bible study would begin, and I was consoling a wild one year old red head who couldn't find her blanky, a four-year-old with wild hair to tame, screaming because of the tangles, and a six-year-old rambunctious boy who wanted to GO.

Five minutes later, I am loaded into the truck and sending up a quick prayer the truck will start and run as it should. It does. Then I realize I have kids to load.

With huffs and puffs and lots of screams, my almost two-year-old daughter was loaded and fastened. Score 1. No issues. Child number two, load and get him buckled. Score number 2. No issues.

I should have known better.

I have noticed even when I am stressed and overwhelmed, even when I am in a hurry, with God at my center- my heart is softer and more pliable with unexpected snafues. COOL!

Here's when the unexpected loses control- and I shout Jesus take the wheel. I need you.

When I lifted and loaded my four-year-old, everything was dandy- till the little chubby chin tilted down. As I buckled her. Mom fail number 1. Yes. There is more than one. It breaks my heart, but thinking back and looking at myself- A year ago- two years ago- I would have chastised her, told her she shouldn't have put her chin down, should have looked forward like she always did. I would have gotten frustrated and angry at myself for being so callous.

Instead, I consoled my daughter, with an aching heart, swiping away at each tear. Counting them as they rolled down my thumb. My heart thumping away. Church an afterthought in that moment- my sole focus on extending grace and love to my daughter.

She pointed to each individual tear as the sobs turned to whimpers and an angry red dot appeared on her chin. When she was taking big breaths- she looked me dead in the eyes and said "Happy Mother's Day mama, I love you-" before proceeding to fall into a series of sobs again. When I say my mom heart shattered while attempting to cover my laugh as she fell into a fit of sobbing and giggles, I literally can't. When I say facepalm, I mean it.

IT GETS WORSE. If that wasn't bad enough. I pulled into the parking lot as quickly as I could, checking her in the rearview mirror. I unloaded everyone, grabbed my "suitcases." Then attached myself to the baggage while carrying my almost two-year-old on my hip. My son jumped over his sister and practically rolled out as his sister screamed to unstrap her.

I lock the door, shut the front one, and proceed to unstrap her. She gets out, cool were good to go. I pull her to my side, and she screams as I swing the door shut.

She goes flying with the door.

My four-year-old stumbles forward at the momentum of the door because either hair is caught in the hinge. Fail number 2.

I am off to a WONDERFUL start.

Now- imagine if you will- a mother bobbing back and forth like a chicken, trying to decide whether to console her hysterical daughter stuck in the door, or unlock it to unstick her from it before consoling her. Imagine a mother with arms full, trying to get to her keys to unlock the door as her daughter cry's, head pinned to the door because a HUGE clump of it is stuck.

Got a good image? Great. That was me. No joke- Fail number 3. Car door score- 2 Britt- 0.

I finally get the door unlocked and quickly get her unstuck. I am proceeding to loving on her, calming her down, and rectifying the situation. Old me would have said screw this. I am going home. Church is NOT in the cards today.

New me, sat, took deep breaths, had her breathe with me- and as she calmed.... she looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Happy Mother's Day mama- It's ok," before proceeding to hunch over into sobs again and curl into my arms.

I held her and apologized profusely and turned the situation into a joke which made her laugh- and when she was ready, I asked her if she still wanted to go to Church. She looked at me with wide eyes and nodded vigorously.

In the end, we made it- and we were only 7 minutes late. This all happened in a span of seventeen minutes. BUT- the moral of the story, and why I want to make God famous- I have seen a change in my daughter. She is a brutal little bruiser, but as time has gone on, she has been leading with more grace and humility. She leads with more love. She leads with a quick apology or steps up when her sister or brother needs help.

Make HIM famous. Why? Because He alone leads with grace, humility, richousness, glory- and every other good thing out there. He changes hearts- and molds them- to His purpose. A purpose for good-

Mama- it starts at home. Dad it starts at home. Don't think for a second they don't watch. I have caught myself doing things my "parents" did or said to me growing up- and I have learned to STOP. THINK. and PROCESS how this will affect the future.

Let the past transgressions RUN into you. Be the wall for your children, stand up- and remmeber- the work has been done. God only wants to show you love. Even in the trials. You need only to let go and show that to your children. <3